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  • Writer's pictureCWP Society

Ghosting in the Wedding Industry

Updated: Mar 28, 2022

With the madness of the 2020 and 2021 wedding planning, there has been a rise in wedding vendors and clients “ghosting” wedding planners. This is happening all across the US and beyond. Why is this happening?


First, what is ghosting, anyway? If you have ever sent an email or text to someone with no response, or given someone a call but never heard back, you have been ghosted.


It’s understandable how this may have become such an issue in the wedding industry. The 2021 wedding season was filled to the brim with overbooked calendars for wedding pros, since planners were dealing with postponements from the 2020 wedding season. The wedding industry was drowning in a sea of rescheduled weddings, leaving planners and vendors scrambling to try and stay afloat. Because of this, communication between planners and wedding pros was either extremely delayed or non-existent. This was bad news for wedding planners in particular, since their whole job description revolves around communication.


Here are some of the most common examples of ghosting that you may run into as a wedding planner:


1. Potential Clients

An engaged couple might reach out to you via email, contact form, social media messaging, phone call, or any other form of communication, and you will most likely respond with a carefully crafted and thoughtful response only to never hear from that couple again. Why does this happen?


That couple might have been sending out inquiries to multiple planners, and they may have only wanted to focus on a few that they had narrowed down rather than taking the time to respond to each and every one that they initially reached out to. Later in this post, we’ll get into some tips on how to avoid being one of those overlooked planners.


2. Existing Clients

As surprising as this may sound, it is also possible for couples who have already booked you to ghost you in the middle of the planning process. This could be due to a number of reasons: the couple may be feeling overwhelmed, having second thoughts about the wedding, or experiencing any number of other circumstances that may inhibit them from responding in a timely manner. However, this can put you as their planner in an uncomfortable position, as now you are left trying to communicate with an unresponsive couple about important details regarding their upcoming wedding.


3. Fellow Wedding Pros

When you reach out to a fellow wedding professional (photographer, videographer, florist, caterer, venue, etc.) regarding a client, you may not hear back from them. This can be troublesome, as your entire job as a wedding planner relies heavily on communication with vendors. When you are trying to obtain information for your clients, other wedding pros, wedding vendors, or simply so you yourself can better do your job, it can be incredibly frustrating to be left in the dark like this. Read on for some tips on how to avoid being ghosted by the vendors you work with.


It is very likely to experience ghosting at some point in one’s career in the wedding industry. While it is impossible to avoid this phenomenon entirely, there are some simple ways to reduce the chances of it happening to you.


Tips to Avoid Being Ghosted by a Client


1. Respond Quickly

One of our Golden Rules we teach here at The Bridal Society is to respond back to emails, messages, and voicemails within 12-24 business hours. The bulk of your job as a wedding planner revolves around communication. Responding back quickly to your potential clients will set the right tone for what it will be like to work with you. Taking days to respond back may be considered a red flag for them, as that gives the impression that you will be unresponsive during the planning process as well. Of course, a great way to avoid being ghosted by existing clients as well would be to avoid ghosting them. Make sure that you are maintaining that 12-24 business hour rule throughout the entire planning process.


2. Keep The Conversation Going

You may be unintentionally creating a dead end by how you respond to your potential or existing clients. Asking a question in your response message will open the door for the conversation to keep flowing. The back-and-forth this creates will allow you to develop a relationship with potential clients even before setting up a meeting, and it will also encourage continued responses from your clients well into the planning process.


You may want to make sure the initial contact form on your website is short and sweet so you don’t run out of those initial get-to-know-you questions before booking your clients. Get the key details such as their name, email address, phone number, wedding date and/or wedding location, but leave it at that. Information such as what vendors they may have already secured, what their estimated guest count is, or their ideal wedding budget range can all be gathered by asking additional questions in your response to their first inquiry. You can then follow this line of natural conversation to schedule the initial consultation.


3. Follow Up

In the beginning stages of planning their wedding, couples may not be ready to officially meet you, their prospective wedding planner, just yet. They may first want more information about your pricing or availability. Once they have the answers they need, they may simply move on without another word. It is a good idea to set up a system of following up with an initial lead to check that the couple received your response. If you don’t hear back after following up, it is time to let them go.


Tips to Avoid Being Ghosted by Wedding Pros


1. Be Discerning

You as the wedding planner have complete control over which wedding pros you include on your Preferred Vendors List. Make sure that you are vetting everyone on this list before working with them, and that you are only allowing those who you know are responsive and will get back to you. These are professionals with whom you should have a solid relationship with. If you are being ghosted by the vendors on your Preferred Vendors List, do not be afraid to remove them. You don’t need to continuously bring them business if they are putting you in that position time and time again.


2. Communicate & Come to an Agreement

It’s always a good idea to build a trusting relationship with your fellow wedding pros that is built on open communication from the beginning. When you are getting to know a vendor, you can outline your expectations in a clear but respectful manner. Let them know that you will need to hear back from them within a certain time frame in order for your relationship to work. Tell them that even something as simple as a quick, “Hey, got your email. I’ll get back to you by the end of the week,” would be more than enough to ensure that you know what to expect from them, even when they are unexpectedly busy.


3. Schedule a Zoom Meeting

One way to get everyone on the same page is to schedule a Zoom meeting with the professionals on your Preferred Vendors List. You can either do this individually or in a group with everyone on your list. In this meeting, you can go over the expectations mentioned above regarding communication and professionalism.


Another bonus tip is to let your vendors know that you are on their side. Your intention is to bring them as much business as possible because you know that they will treat you and your clients right. You and your vendors share a mutually beneficial relationship that relies heavily on open communication. If this is made clear from the beginning, you should be all set.


Want to hear more about this topic? Listen to this month’s episode of the Wedding Planner Podcast with Laurie Hartwell & Krisy Thomas on Apple Music, Spotify, or wherever you get your podcasts.




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